If you follow me on Instagram, then you saw that I spent my Saturday at Oprah’s The Life You Want Tour at Prudential Center. I have to say, this was an impromptu attendance. I got an invite late Friday night and I debated going because I wanted my sister with me. Two years ago my sister and I went to Oprah ‘s Life Class with Deepak Chopra so Oprah was “our thing”. It was something we enjoyed doing together. Which is why I wanted to share this experience with her.
Although I had an amazing time, I spent a good portion of the day missing my sister. We had planned to attend the workshop but couldn’t secure a ticket and not once did I thought to register as press. So when I got the invite, I was slightly mad at the timing but grateful for the opportunity. To solidify any doubts I had about my attendance, as Oprah walked onto the stage one of the sentence out of her mouth was – “If you’re here today, you were meant to be here.” Here are a few things I learned about myself while sitting quieting in the audience . Hope it proves useful for you as well.
Being a Hero of My Own Life – What Oprah’s The Life You Want Tour Taught Me About Myself
1. Be Silent in Your thoughts
It’s when you’re silent that you can drown out the noise and truly hear what your heart desire – Oprah. Oprah and I had this in common, she loves to sit and meditate. I don’t meditate however I enjoy quieting my mind by being alone and working through my thoughts. No special humming, no fuss just me in all my glory. Silence isn’t deafening to me. I have no problem spending time all by myself with my own thoughts. In fact I cherish those moments, most people think I’m weird for it, and making friends is hard. When I was younger, I loved going to the movies by myself. I don’t have a problem eating alone at restaurants or going to the movies by myself. It actually empowered me.
2. Life is Unpredictable
“You never know how a good quest will end, but it’s guaranteed to be an interesting adventure.” – Elizabeth Gilbert. Sitting in the auditorium listening to Elizabeth share her story. I couldn’t’ help but see the parallel. At one point in my life, I was faced with a decision, move forth or be still and stay miserable. I debated with myself for way too long, and although I ended up moving on. Looking back, I wish I had made the decision sooner. However, I was afraid of the unknown and I still am. Don’t be afraid to venture out into the unknown. Take a risk because anything worth doing will be uncomfortable. If it scares you, go for it.
3. Allow Yourself to Forgive
“With bitterness in your heart you can’t move forward” – Rob Bell. I’ve made some decisions in life that I am having a hard time forgiving myself for. I’ve lived a life of what ifs. I’ve tried but failed endlessly to move forward. However hearing Rob Bell share his experience on Saturday stuck with me. I chatted with a friend who suggest I sign up for Iyanla’s 6 weeks ecourse – Forgiveness with Iyanla – How to Forgive Everyone for Everything.
4. It’s Okay To Cry
I remember an incident about a year or two ago. I was on my way to a client’s meeting and I got into a fender bender. I was already having a bad week and the accident was just the straw to break the camel’s back. I was so frustrated that I sat there on the highway just wailing, crying so hard. I remember asking God, “Why me, why was my life in such a shamble, why can’t I do anything right” Right there, I remember begging God asking him forgiveness – “Whatever it’s that I did, I am sorry” It felt like I couldn’t get anything right. I was having such a crazy week that the accident was literally the last straw and at that moment, all I could do was cry. It was ridiculous, so unwarranted however it was all I could do.
5. Embrace The Life You Have
“Don’t focus your energy wondering why you’ve your life. Instead embrace the life you have.” – Rob Bell. Judging from my crying fiasco, you can tell I’ve had my share of “why me” moments. However things happen. We are not going to always like it but you have to learn to deal with the hand you’re dealt.
6. Friendship is Important
“Life has been designed that we NEED each other. No one can make it alone.” – Mark Nepo. I will be the first to admit it, I have trust issue. It’s hard to truly have a deep and meaningful friendship because past experiences have led me to the same conclusion. It’s a constant struggle with me. I’ve attempted and failed miserably time and time again. It ends with betrayal, loss, and heartache. Maybe I have high expectation or movies have romanticized the whole friendship thing. When you think about it, I am the only common denominator, so I have to ask myself what it’s about me that attract such behavior. Yes, I am naive and my desire to want to be alone makes it hard to truly open up. Until I fix my issue, I will hold on to the few I have, and continue working on the rest. Yes, no man is an island but 35 years of I don’t need anyone can’t be undone over night.
7. Don’t Settle for Mediocre
“Don’t you dare give up on that question that’s burning within you about the world.” – Eliabeth Gilbert. If you’ve read Eat, Pray, Love then you’re familiar with Elizabeth’s story. She encouraged us to move out of our comfort zone in order to get where we need to be. I’ve read her book and I’ve seen the movie. However hearing her share her story felt good. It was a reminder to listen to that tiny voice in my head. I’ve become complacent and I need to ignite the fire to get closer to where I want to be.
8. It’s Okay To Have Doubts
I over think a lot of things. Always second guessing myself, and according to Elizabeth Gilbert it’s okay to be unsure but don’t let that stop you. Make a decision and stick with it. Don’t let your doubtfulness keep you from moving to the next level.
9. In Life you don’t have to get an A, a C is just as good.
Iyanla Vanzant shared something that I thought was interesting – “If you made it through the past you’ve already passed. Getting a C means, “You’ve the Courage to make a Change and the Commitment to see through the Consequences”. I thought this was an interesting way to approach past experiences.
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Were you at Oprah’s The Life You Want Weekend? What life lesson did you come home with? Do you have other life lessons you would like to share.
Huge Thanks to Toyota for inviting to the event. Please come back tomorrow for my interview with Ms. Tawanda Jones the recipient of Toyota Standing O-vation Award.